Thursday, 23 June 2011

My First Love

Yup, I am joining another blogging challenge in tne interests of keeping this thing moving!! Over at Word Nerd Speaks, a weekly challenge is going on in which everyone writes a post about a chosen topic!

This week, the topic is First Love, and as this is a dating blog, it seemed like a good time to join in!

When I think about who my real first love was, my brain gets in a tangle. You see, for me, there are different levels of first love. A first crush can feel like first love, then a first boyfriend, and finally the more....grown up version of love, the first time you feel it.

When anyone asks me who my first love was, I often tell them it was Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing! When I was around 6 or 7, I watched the movie for the first time and I swear that man is the reason my expectations of men are so high!

It wasn't until I reached high school that I got to experience those feelings towards a real person. I won't mention him by name, but he was my first boyfriend. He wasn't even remotely like Patrick Swayze, but that was okay with me. He was fun, sexy, sweet. Although our relationship was pretty short lived and full of ups and downs, I sometimes think that it was one of the best relationships I have ever been in - present relationship aside.

Who was your first love? Did that person feel the same way? Are you still together?

Wednesday, 22 June 2011

Just friends?

It has long been debated whether or not men and women can be "just friends". Some think it is a stupid question because, obviously men and women can get along without wanting to boink each other's brains out. Others think that one will always develop romantic feelings and it will become awkward.

In the interests of discovering what the majority think - I have made a very short survey on the topic. Any responses may be used in an article for Yahoo Shine or Associated Content. Would love to hear your thoughts!

Click here to take survey

Monday, 13 June 2011

Commitment Issues

I have an excellent relationship with my boyfriend. But, alas, he is a typical man. If he hears the word "wedding" or "pregnant" I see him visibly flinch and try his best not to make a run for the door. I don't take his reactions personally because I understand that there are some things he just isn't ready for.

This isn't the case for all women. There are those who become so desperate for a commitment that they begin dropping small - or enormous - hints. It's okay to want a commitment, that's pretty normal. But when you are having to force your man into talking, and pushing him into an engagement, marriage or starting a family, you could be headed for trouble. Having made some mistakes in the past, and witnessing some disasters caused by my friends, I have written an article which might help.

What Not to do When You Want Your Man to Commit

Tuesday, 31 May 2011

Bad boys vs. Good Guys - the results!

I know I usually post on Mondays, but I was away for the weekend, chilling at a spa hotel. It was a shame we couldn't stay longer, but work was calling me!

A little while ago I asked for quotes about whether women prefer bad boys to good guys. Huge thanks to everyone who participated, I had lots of fun sifting through all of the responses!

The article actually turned out to be pretty popular when it was published, so now I am going to share it with you. Check it out to see if your quote was featured!

What Woman Want: Good Guys or Bad Boys?

Monday, 23 May 2011

Beware the cellphone.....

Happy Monday, everyone!

First of all, thanks to everyone who helped me out with quotes for my article about Bad Boys vs Nice Guys. Hopefully it will be published during the week so I will let you know!

Now onto today's post! How many of you have been caught out when using cellphones or social media? Maybe you have sent a text to the wrong person and it caused trouble, or perhaps you were tagged in a dodgy looking Facebook photo.

The impact of these things on relationships can be huge, and in severe cases, cause break-ups. Sure, it's not the phones or the social networking sites that really create the problems but they definitely increase the speed that damage can be done. Have you ever made any of these mistakes?

5 Ways Technology Can Ruin Your Relationship

Wednesday, 18 May 2011

Looking for quotes! Bad boys vs. Nice guys

Hey peeps!

I am looking to write an article about whether women prefer bad boys or nice guys and the reasons why, and I need some quotes from anyone who has an opinion!

Your comments may appear in an article on Yahoo Shine or Associated Content. Please leave your name (or a real sounding name) and your State/County with your response in the comments section or email me at: kyralennon@gmail.com

Thanks!

Monday, 16 May 2011

Anxiety and dating

Anxiety is one thing I feel I can talk about with some authority. I have had panic attacks since I was 14, and had varying degrees of stress at numerous points in my life since then. For a while, I thought that I would never get over it and that I was obviously a basket case because nobody else I knew had any such problem. Turned out, it was/is far more common than I knew and there were a whole world of people out there who had the same feelings and the same concerns.

Dating with anxiety is hard work. Not every guy will be patient and understanding, and there is always that fear that if you tell him about your anxiety, he will think you're crazy. The good news is, it doesn't have to be so hard. There are some ways to make it less stressful to find a boyfriend without having to hide the things you are going through.

How to Date With Anxiety



Monday, 9 May 2011

Dating Lessons Learned

You know how, when you were a teenager, you thought you knew everything about boys and dating and love? No matter what anyone told you, you thought you knew best? Then when you grew up, you realised that many times, the other people were right.

I have been thinking about this a lot lately. I wasn't a major dating know-it-all when I was younger, but I did feel that trusting my instincts was better than any advice anyone could give me. In some respects, I still agree with that. But there were moments when I really could have saved myself a lot of pain if I had listened to my friends and family.

I recently wrote an article on the topic - Things I Wish I'd Known About Dating When I Was 20. Take a look, and tell me what things you would tell yourself about dating if you could go back in time.

Saturday, 7 May 2011

Blog makeover

Inspired by my friend Langley, I decided my blog was in need of a little makeover! Although I don't see a time when I will change my awesome banner, the plain pink background was boring me rigid. Now I have a new background and a cool signature, I will be more inspired to post!

I got my background from here, check it out for yourself if you want give your blog a bit of a boost!

Friday, 6 May 2011

Chicksand!

Have any of you guys been watching ABC's Happy Endings? That is a funny show, and in an early episode, it created a brand new term - chicksand. This is funny to me in so many ways - not least because it's so brilliant I can't help wondering why nobody thought of it before!

This word NEEDS to break into modern slang - so I decided I would do my bit to spread the word!

How to Avoid Being a Chicksand Girlfriend

Tuesday, 3 May 2011

I got an award!



Elizabeth Mueller presented me with this cool award for completing the A-Z blogging challenge! As someone who loves collecting blog awards, I was pretty excited to get one of these! :D Thanks Elizabeth!

Normal blogging service will probably resume towards the end of the week, after I catch up with some of the work I have missed from reading so many blog posts!

Saturday, 30 April 2011

Z is for Ze end of ze blogging challenge!

Haha, no I couldn't think of anything else!

I know this is a dating blog, but I am going to use this post to say how much I loved the blog challenge! As I had been slacking over here it was really nice to get some motivation back again.

Thanks to everyone who has commented! If I haven't visited your blog yet, it is just because I have been incredibly busy. I have found some fantastic blogs through this challenge and I will continue to visit them from now on!!

Y is for You Give Me Something

This song reminds of a a guy I had an online relationship with a few years ago. All of the lyrics really sum up the feeling of falling for someone when you never really intended to. Every time I hear it, it makes me smile because I remember him and the many hours we spent chatting, flirting and laughing. Enjoy!

Thursday, 28 April 2011

X is for X Factor Awkwardness

I know it doesn't seem like the X Factor has anything to do with dating, but check out this video and you might just change your mind!

Wednesday, 27 April 2011

W is for Wedding (Royal!)

SO, being a Brit doesn't necessarily make me any more interested in the royal wedding than anyone else but with just 2 days to go, I am getting excited now! Everywhere around big cities and small towns, Union Jack flags and pictures of Prince William and Kate Middleton are in shop windows - there is no escaping it!

If you aren't from the UK, you probably don't care about any of this. I can't really blame you either - it is pretty much a big fuss over something that won't really affect anyone. However, if you are interested, take a look at this article about a great British royal wedding tradition!

Tuesday, 26 April 2011

V is for Variety?

My friend Kendall suggested a cool topic for an article the other day, but I don't yet know if I have enough of an opinion to write 500 words about it *lol*. They topic was open relationships - hence V is for Variety.

For me, the idea of an open relationship is a weird one. I don't think I could cope with the idea of being in a relationship with someone who was also seeing other people. To me, being in a relationship means not wanting to be with anyone else. I would never judge anyone who is in an open relationship because I guess it works for some people, but it would never work for me.

What do you think?

Saturday, 23 April 2011

T is for Time Out

Benefits of Taking Time Away from Your Partner

How often has your boyfriend or husband got on your nerves? Sometimes, living with someone means you don't get as much space as you need. It is really important that you don't spend so much time together that you begin to annoy each other. There is nothing wrong with going out with your friends, or letting him do something with his buddies. After all, how can you miss each other if you're never apart?

Friday, 22 April 2011

S is for Sex Drive

A person's sex drive can go up and down like a rollercoaster! One minute you can't get enough of your man, the next, sex is a chore. If you feel that way, you are definitely not alone. These ups and downs happen to everyone at some point and the best way to handle them is not to let them worry you too much. Couples can't be hot for each other every minute of the day for the rest of their lives - it would be exhausting! However, if you are having problems that are lasting a long time, here are a few common issues and solutions to help you out!

Thursday, 21 April 2011

R is for Rough Patches

In relationships, sometimes things are great and sometimes they suck. Rough patches come and go from time to time but when they last for a long time it can really damage your relationship. It's hard to know what to do for the best sometimes but if your relationship is worth fighting for - take my advice! :D

How to Get Through a Rough Patch in Your Relationship

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Q is for Quickie

LOL, where did you expect me to go on a dating blog when the letter is Q?!

I don't have any embarrassing stories of my own to share but a friend of mine was once caught having a quickie in the shower with her boyfriend when his mother walked in! Not good! Do you have any quickie anecdotes of the embarrassing kind?

P is for Parents

Tips for Meeting Your Partner's Parents for the First Time

Is there anything more scary than meeting your boyfriend's parents for the first time? You want to make a good impression, but you are so terrified you convince yourself that they are going to hate you.

Thankfully, I have never made any enormous mistakes when meeting a boyfriend's parents for the first time, but I bet some of you have some stories to share! Let me know in the comments! :D

(P.S I am hoping to have time to reply to comments again today - I have been busy lately, but I think I am getting back on track!)

Monday, 18 April 2011

O is for Older Men

When I was five years old, I was in love with Patrick Swayze and from then on I have always had a thing for older men!

I can't say for sure why I have always liked them so much, though I'm inclined to believe it has something to do with feeling safe and secure. I've dated men my own age, but for some reason older men have always held much more appeal.

It's no big surprise that I am with an older man now - and there is a pretty significant age gap between us - but it works for us!

The Benefits of Dating an Older Man

Saturday, 16 April 2011

N is for Nursery

Lol, no I'm not pregnant - but it was the only kid related word I could think of to use for a silly Saturday post!

Today I was reminded of a website one of my friends showed me a few years ago. MakeMeBabies is a site where you can upload a photo of you and your partner to see what your future children will look like! My friend and I spent hours creating babies with celebrities to see how they would look. Sometimes they were cute, sometimes scary but it provides plenty of mindless entertainment, perfect for a Saturday afternoon!

This is my Zac Efron baby as an example! When you have some time, make some of your own - and feel free to share them in the comments! :p

Friday, 15 April 2011

M is for Marriage

Reasons You Shouldn't Rush into Marriage

It's unfortunate that these days, many people seem to look at a marriage with the belief that it comes with an easy way out. I'm not anti-divorce or anything, but I do believe that they shouldn't be the quick answer when things get rough. A divorce should be a last resort.

Sadly, people seem to rush into marriages so they can have a big party, only to find that married life might not really have been what they wanted after all.

I've never had that "must get married right now" urge. I've been in long term relationships before, and I thought that maybe one day I would get married but it was never a race for me. A girl I knew at college was determined that she would get married, and was actually engaged to two different men with a pretty short gap in between. She was someone's wife by the age of 20, and thankfully, it worked for her.

It's not getting married young that irks me though. It's the rush. And the belief that marriage vows are something which can just be taken back when you get bored of them. Maybe I am old-fashioned, but if and when I get married, it will be to someone I have taken the time to get to know, and with the belief that it will last forever. Things may not work out how I hoped, but at least I will know that I went into my marriage with the right attitude.

Thursday, 14 April 2011

L is for Loser

5 Signs He is a Loser

The above article was written by my friend Kendall, and it got me thinking about all of the loser boyfriends I've had. To be fair, my long term boyfriends weren't losers. But the ones in between weren't always the best choices.

There was the guy who was sending me flirty text messages - which were all the rage when mobile phones first became popular *lol* - I kinda liked him, until I realised he was sending them to several girls at once. Weirdo.

Then there was the "boomerang" boyfriend who couldn't quite figure out whether he wanted a relationship or not. They are the worst. I eventually made his decision for him. :D


Almost everyone has a story to tell when it comes to losers. Share some of yours with me! :D Link

Wednesday, 13 April 2011

K is for Knight in Shining Armour

Like many other little girls, I was read fairy tales as a child. I also watched Disney movies which led me to believe that the handsome Prince, or the knight in shining armour would whisk me away to a life of sunshine, birds chirping happily in the trees and a world where fat days just don't exist.

Fast forward 20 years and you get, well, reality. The handsome Prince and knight in shining armour either forgot me, or were too stubborn to switch on their SatNav to find my house.

That said, that doesn't mean I didn't get one. I suppose my love life runs along the lines of Shrek! No, no, my boyfriend is not a green, overweight ogre. I just mean that I was looking for what I thought I wanted and found something unexpected.

A lot of women refuse to look outside of their "man checklist" when they are trying to find a date, but they run the risk of missing out on the perfect person just for the sake of a tiny flaw.

Reasons You're Still Single

Tuesday, 12 April 2011

J is for Jealousy

If you look through my dating articles, you will find several covering the topic of jealousy. The reason? I happen to have a lot of experience in the area. I have never been in a relationship with someone who is jealous - I am the jealous one.

It's one of the worst, and most useless feelings in the world. It doesn't change anything, it doesn't make a person less likely to cheat, it is simply a waste of energy. When I realised this, everything slid into focus. Why be jealous when you can be happy?

It's not easy to change the thought processes of a lifetime. It takes a lot of effort, willpower and internal strength to stop unfounded accusations come flying out of your mouth. But with time it really does get easier.

Ways to Deal With Your Jealousy

Monday, 11 April 2011

I is for I Love You

The Importance of Saying "I Love You"

Call me soppy if you must, but I am a big fan of those three little words. Of course, I don't want to hear them if they aren't genuine, but within a relationship I think a couple should say "I love you" as often as possible.

You don't have to say it with words all the time. Often, actions can do the talking. It's usually in the little things, not the grand gestures that feelings of love are most obvious.

Even so, hearing and saying the words are important too. I am one of those people who strongly believes that you should always let a person know you love them whenever you really feel it and not just when you want something! :p

Saturday, 9 April 2011

H is for Heartless Wench

Let me give you a brief explanation about the time my friend decided to date my ex boyfriend, and the pitfalls of deciding to choose a man over a friend.

More than anyone, I understand that it isn't a simple situation and I know that some women don't want their friends dating their exes for purely selfish reasons. That wasn't the case for me. My ex was still my best friend. The reason for our split was not that we couldn't get on, rather it was lacking the spark to make the relationship go the distance, if you know what I mean ;)

The "friend" who got with my ex was an online friend. I had never met her in person before but she had just been through a break up from her partner of 8 years and I invited her over for a while to cheer her up.

Funny, the one who ended up miserable was me.

It wouldn't have been half as bad if she hadn't lied her way to his heart. She was a manipulative type, saying things subtly to make him question me. After 8 years of friendship, you'd think he would know better but that wasn't the case.

I won't deny that I made mistakes at the time too. I could have handled the situation much better. But not once did I tell a lie to get my own way.

What made it so hard for me was that he really couldn't have cared less about me once she came on the scene. He treated me like something he had scraped off the bottom of his shoe. Oh sure, he made a few lame attempts to make it seem as if he cared about my friendship but never once did he pick up the phone to check in and see how I am. I called a few times at first, hoping that if I made the initiative, then maybe he would too. He never did though. The last text I sent him regarding some of his crap I found at my house, he ignored.

It doesn't hurt so much anymore. And maybe I shouldn't blame the heartless wench for lying about me when he should have been able to think with his brain and not his penis. But women like her make me mad. I hate that there are women who are so desperate not to be alone that they throw themselves at the first man that looks their way regardless of who they might hurt.

I say this not to offend, rather to explain just how much damage can be done when people put their own feelings above anyone else's. While it would always have been weird for a friend to date my ex, I would have been an awful lot happier if she hadn't lied to me and to him about her motives.

Perhaps one day she will get what she deserves, but I won't waste time thinking about it. It seems the less conscience a person has, the more they get away with.

In the words of the legendary Kurt Cobain, "I would rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not."

Friday, 8 April 2011

G is for Girls!

Being a girl is not always fun and games. In fact, there are certain days when it sucks majorly. However, while I'm not a full on "girly" girl, I do appreciate the simple pleasures of dressing up for a night out or gazing longingly at expensive shoes and handbags.

Although I am no longer a single girl, when I was, I tried as hard as I could to be independant and learn how to do things without the help of a man (or my mother lol).

Let me know which thing you think are a must before you settle down!

Thursday, 7 April 2011

F is for First Kisses

Nobody ever forgets their first kiss. Whether it was horribly embarrassing or sweet and romantic, the first kiss is the one that is always the most terrifying and the most memorable.

My first ever kiss was actually at a family party, which sounds insane - who wants their first kiss to be in front of their entire family, right?! But it happened when I was 13, on a crowded dancefloor with a guy who I knew I would never see again because he lived far away and, might I add, was not a relative! :p He was the son of a friend of the person whose party it was. He was incredibly hot though!! :D

It isn't just your first ever kiss that is awkward though. A first kiss with a new partner can sometimes be awkward too. Do you keep it gentle, or really let him know how much you like him by yanking him into a passionate embrace? I am more a fan of the gentle approach, but it often depends on the situation. What do you think? Feel free to share any first kiss stories in the comments!

The First Kiss

Wednesday, 6 April 2011

E is for Excite

What is a relationship without a bit of excitement now and again?!

Sadly, the phase of ripping each other's clothes off in the heat of passion is not always a long one. If your man needs some inspiration, better than "The kids are asleep, let's do it!" check out this article by my friend Krazy Kendall!

(Apologies for the short post, busy day ahead!)

Tuesday, 5 April 2011

D is for Distance

Warning: This isn't really a happy post. Feel free to skip it, I won't be offended! Normal service will resume tomorrow!

Distance in a relationship can be either physical or mental. Long distance relationships are happening a lot nowadays as so many people are meeting through the internet. I sometimes think a physical distance is a little easier to deal with than emotional distance. When you are far away from the one you love, you miss being able to have a good morning kiss and to just have someone to hold you on the hard days. That is gut-wrenching, but at the same time, you have the hope that one day you will be together properly and everything will be just as you want.

Emotional distance is a lot tougher to overcome sometimes. One minute, you think everything is fine and you and your partner are on the exact same wavelength, then suddenly you have absolutely no idea what is going on in the other person's head. You want to talk about it, but they don't, or they tell you nothing is wrong when it is obvious that isn't the case. So, you keep quiet and hope it blows over. Maybe it will, maybe it won't.

The fact is, if you are a talker and you partner refuses to discuss anything, you may have to just accept that is the way things are or break it off and find someone who understands why talking is so important.

Monday, 4 April 2011

C is for Confidence

In Saturday's post for "B" we covered break-ups. Continuing that theme, I would like to talk about getting your confidence back after a break-up. Confidence always suffers when a relationship ends and it is hard to find a way to get it back.

During my hardest break-up, I just couldn't bear to get out of bed. I felt that I would never find anyone who I loved that much again and I didn't think anyone would want such an emotional wreck anyway. A good friend of mine told me to get out of bed, take a long bubble bath, put on my favourite clothes and force myself to smile. I told him that he was an idiot and it would never work. After a little more nagging, I did as I was told. Of course, I wasn't instantly cured but it did make a big difference to my overall state of mind.

The key to getting your confidence back after a break-up is to do small things that take the pain away for a while. When the pain eases, you feel like yourself again and your self-esteem isn't quite as low. I can't promise it will be a fast process but if you stick with it, you will slowly find your way back to being as happy as you were before the heartbreak.

Saturday, 2 April 2011

B is for Break-ups


Add ImageNobody likes breaking up. Whether you have been with someone for six weeks, six months or six years, there is always a certain level of pain involved when a relationship ends. Some people handle a break-up with as much ease as is possible. Anger, crying, talking, moping and eating insane amounts of chocolate and ice cream are pretty common ways to handle it.

However, for others it isn't as easy to deal with. Not all people handle break-ups in a graceful, healthy way. It's understandable to want to inflict pain on the person who broke your heart but there are plenty of reasons why you shouldn't. If you are having a hard time after your relationship ended, check out these unhealthy ways to handle a break-up to make sure you are dealing with the situation the best way you possibly can.

Friday, 1 April 2011

A is for....Attributes!

Call me crazy, but I needed to get this blog moving again, so I have taken on a challenge! The A-Z Blogging Challenge to be precise! Every day throughout April (excluding Sundays) I will post a new entry relating to the letters of the alphabet. This means you will get plenty of brand new relationship advice and the occasional song or photograph when I can't think of anything else that will fit! :p

We will be starting with A for attributes! More specifically, physical attributes women find irresistible in men. Personally, I am almost always attracted to a man's smile more than anything else. A nice smile can brighten your day and in a long term relationship, the ability to laugh and smile through the rough times is a great thing.

What are the physical attributes that attract you to a man?

Thursday, 31 March 2011

Adult Board Games? Yes please!!

I wrote a post about "romantic" board games a long time ago, but after playing one....I realised there is more to them than just the naughty side!

Let's be honest, "Romantic" board games are really a nice way of saying that you are about to get down and dirty in a variety of creative ways! It isn't just about that though. These games have ways of bringing couples closer together. Yes, the sexy side of the games is definitely a good thing but you also get to learn a lot about your partner.

3 Ways Romantic Board Games Can Enhance Your Relationship

Tuesday, 29 March 2011

5 Things You Should Be Able to Openly Discuss With Your Partner

You know those couples who live side by side but never really talk about anything? I have known a few. I guess it works for them but I like to have real conversations and important things.

There are a lot of things to discuss before getting serious with someone. If you can't talk about them, how are you going to live the rest of you life with them?

I recently wrote an article about the 5 things you should be able to openly discuss with your partner, and I am ridiculously proud of it because it is now one of the top most viewed articles on Your Wisdom from Yahoo!

Take a look and see if you agree!

Friday, 25 February 2011

How To Spot a Manipulative Woman

This is a subject very close to my heart. You see, I was unfortunate enough to stumble across one of these women. They are usually well concealed behind a cutesy voice and fluttering eyelashes. They have the ability to pressure you into changing the way you think - but in a way that makes you think it was all your idea.

Manipulative women almost make me ashamed to be female. It's sad when people feel they need to lie and trick their way through life. In the interests of warning others about them, I wrote this article: How To Spot a Manipulative Woman . Hopefully this guide will help put a dent in their campaign to rule the world! :p

Monday, 21 February 2011

I'm back - with more advice!

Hello to anyone who is still reading this! I have no better excuse for my absence than being busy with work, however I am back now and ready to get back to giving dating advice!

I return with a topic that confuses many women. How to tell when a man is serious about you, or just using you to "bridge the gap". The signs are incredibly easy to spot, and to be honest, most women know what they are and hear them correctly, they just don't want to admit the truth. :( It's a hard thing to do when you are really into a guy, but why waste time when it's going nowhere? You should just turn your worrying time into finding someone who appreciates you! For those who need a little help reading the signals, check out Five Signs He is Leading You On.